Sugar and Spice, But Are You TOO Nice?


I’d rather be nice than naughty, but I’d rather be naughty than TOO nice.


My definition of TOO nice: unnecessarily going above and beyond to help and care for others, without receiving reciprocation

Disagree with me if you choose, but I consider myself a nice person.  I will go miles out of my way to help anyone I consider a friend, a stranger who is in need of help, and most importantly, my family members.

I don’t need to go ahead and list the examples of the kind actions I have done, but if you know me, I’m sure you can say at least two nice things that I’ve done for you.  And yes, I am human, so I’ve had fair share of mean actions, as well.

You know that bitch named Karma? She’s one of my best friends.  My other best friends are my dad and my mom, and a few other very close friends and family members.  I do not need anyone else, UNLESS they prove to be loyal, honest, trustworthy, and can make me laugh. #QualityOverQuantity


There have been numerous people in my life who I considered friends, and therefore, did nice things for, who I had to cut off ties with because they ended up being disrespectful, and frankly, not worth my time.

For example, a friend I had since I was five years-old, moved away during middle school.  She developed bad habits at her new school, and turned into a completely different person.  When she came to stay with me in high school, she stole money from me.  I haven’t spoken to her since, and I don’t plan on it.  It’s not about the money I lost, even though it was a significant amount.  It’s about the #PRINCIPLE: how could someone I’ve known for almost all my life, do such a thing?

Another “friend” I had, took complete advantage of me.  I took her into my home during a hurricane when her house had no power.  I cooked for her, made sure she was comfortable, and let her wear my clothes, as any good friend would do. She had never reciprocated any of these actions when I was in need of a good friend, and I had found out she had been saying bad things about me behind my back. Bye Felicia.


There are a lot of other situations in which I have helped my so-called friends.  I won’t describe the situations or go into detail because the people they apply to are simply not worth my time or energy (once again), and I prefer to delete them from my life.

Screen Shot 2015-09-10 at 11.28.33 AM

Other situations in which this topic applies to:

  • Driving friends to airports
  • LENDING friends your clothes (key word: lending)
  • Giving friends your old textbooks/ notes
  • Cooking for friends
  • Going out to eat
  • Group projects
  • Many more… Comment below with other situations!

From these experiences and many others, I have decided that I need to be more selfish.  I need to stop worrying about the needs of others who don’t appreciate it, and don’t reciprocate. I’m not looking for any favors or hand outs, but I do expect my friends to help me when I am in a bad situation.  I need to do what’s best for myself, my health, and my academics, and put everything else aside.  Regardless, it’s better to not depend on anyone but yourself, and make sure to prevent yourself from getting into those situations.

Not Felicia,


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